1 00:00:03,044 --> 00:00:06,006 ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:16,534 Aah! 3 00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:33,259 Now to our own pie in the sky... 4 00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:35,762 Bill Pie in the KBBL traffic copter. 5 00:01:35,845 --> 00:01:38,139 - So come in, Bill. - Bad news, drivers. 6 00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:40,263 There's an overturned melon truck on the interstate. 7 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:42,310 It's a mess. There's lots of rubbernecking 8 00:01:42,393 --> 00:01:44,562 and melon wrestling going on, so expect delays... 9 00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:48,358 - Hey, doughnuts! - Bart, there's one left, and it's mine. 10 00:01:55,031 --> 00:01:56,574 - Aw, Homer! - Aw, Dad! 11 00:01:56,658 --> 00:01:59,369 School bus! 12 00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:01,788 Cool your jets, man. We're comin'. 13 00:02:01,871 --> 00:02:04,124 You forgot the special lunches I made. 14 00:02:04,207 --> 00:02:06,584 - That's okay, Mom! - We got money! 15 00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:09,963 - Now, just a darn... - Aah! 16 00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,764 This is Bill Pie, your pie in the sky, 17 00:02:19,848 --> 00:02:22,058 - saying good-bye. - ♪ KBBL ♪ 18 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:25,687 Well, Maggie, it's just you and me again. 19 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:31,901 This is KBBL, K-Babble, all talk, 24 hours a day. 20 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,737 If you'd like to share your embarrassing problem with our audience, 21 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:36,948 we invite you to call our therapist of the airwaves, 22 00:02:37,031 --> 00:02:38,116 Dr. Marvin Monroe. 23 00:02:38,199 --> 00:02:42,453 Our number is 555-PAIN. 24 00:02:42,537 --> 00:02:44,956 Don't be afraid. Call now. 25 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:51,087 Hello. I'd like to talk to Dr. Monroe. 26 00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:52,839 First name, age, problem? 27 00:02:52,922 --> 00:02:57,427 I'm Marge, 34, and my problem is my husband. 28 00:02:57,510 --> 00:03:00,597 He doesn't listen to me. He doesn't appreciate me. 29 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,765 I don't know how much more of this I can... 30 00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:05,476 Hey, lady, save your whining for when you're on the air, okay? 31 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:12,108 Okay, let's see. Next we have Marge. 32 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,111 She's 34 and trapped in a loveless sham of a marriage. 33 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:18,531 Hey, turn it up. I love hearing those wackos. 34 00:03:18,615 --> 00:03:20,074 Tell me 'bout your husband, Marge. 35 00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:21,868 Well... 36 00:03:21,951 --> 00:03:24,704 When we were dating, he was sweeter... 37 00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:27,540 and more romantic, and 40 pounds thinner, 38 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,626 and he had hair, and he ate with utensils. 39 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,505 What was that last thing you said? 40 00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:38,009 Hey, isn't that your wife, Homer? 41 00:03:38,092 --> 00:03:39,177 Don't be ridiculous. 42 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:40,929 My wife worships the ground I walk on. 43 00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:45,600 Marge, it's what I call "harsh reality time." 44 00:03:45,683 --> 00:03:47,769 Your husband sees you as nothing. 45 00:03:47,852 --> 00:03:52,065 - Okay. Well, thank you. - No, no, no, don't hang up. 46 00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:54,567 The pig has made you into his mother. 47 00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:57,695 You are not the hot love object you deserve to be. 48 00:03:57,779 --> 00:03:58,821 Really? 49 00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:01,199 I'm as sure of it as I'm sure my voice is annoying. 50 00:04:01,282 --> 00:04:04,369 Tonight, the second he comes through that front door, 51 00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:06,496 you've got to tell him you're fed up, 52 00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:09,082 and if he doesn't start loving, you will be leaving. 53 00:04:09,165 --> 00:04:11,084 Leave Homer? 54 00:04:11,167 --> 00:04:13,169 - Please, don't use his real name! - Leave Pedro? 55 00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:17,882 - Can you be that honest? - Yeah. 56 00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:20,009 You'll tell him right when he comes home from work. 57 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,135 Yeah! 58 00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:24,347 - Say it like you mean it. - Yeah! 59 00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:26,724 Attagirl. 60 00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:29,769 Aw, come on, Bart. Not again. 61 00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:32,099 Where's your sense of humor? 62 00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:34,524 - Moe's Tavern. - Hello. Is Al there? 63 00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:37,026 - Al? - Yeah, Al. Last name, Coholic. 64 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:39,028 Lemme check. 65 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:42,031 Phone call for Al... Al Coholic! 66 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:45,952 Is there an Al Coholic here? 67 00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:49,706 Wait a minute. 68 00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,708 Listen, you little yellow-bellied rat jackass. 69 00:04:51,791 --> 00:04:54,252 If I ever find out who you are, I'll kill ya! 70 00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:02,468 I hope you do find that punk someday, Moe. Fill 'er up. 71 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:05,638 Is everything okay, Homer? Usually you have a quick one, 72 00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:07,449 some peanuts, a hunk of beef jerky, pickled eggs, 73 00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:08,516 and you're outta here. 74 00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:12,687 Let's just say I don't feel like goin' home tonight. Jar, please. 75 00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,940 Hey, you can level with me. 76 00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:19,235 - You got a domestic situation? - You might say that. 77 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,238 My wife's gonna leave me 'cause she thinks I'm a pig. 78 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,240 - Homer. - What? 79 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,826 Marge is right. You are a pig. You can ask anyone in this bar. 80 00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:30,163 What? Hey, Barney, am I a pig? 81 00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:32,915 You're no more of a pig than I am. 82 00:05:34,584 --> 00:05:37,795 - No! - See? You're a pig. 83 00:05:37,879 --> 00:05:41,507 Barney's a pig. Larry's a pig. We're all pigs. 84 00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:44,344 Except for one difference. 85 00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:47,096 Once in a while, we can crawl out of the slop, 86 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,266 hose ourselves off and act like human beings. 87 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,810 Homer, buy your wife some flowers and take her out 88 00:05:52,894 --> 00:05:54,395 for a night on the town. 89 00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:57,315 Candles, tablecloth, the whole nine yards. 90 00:05:57,398 --> 00:05:59,067 Gee, a romantic evening. 91 00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:01,736 Nah, she's too smart to fall for that. 92 00:06:01,819 --> 00:06:04,072 I'm not done. After dinner, 93 00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:07,784 the two of you are going to check into the fanciest motel in town... 94 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:10,953 and not check out until the next morning, 95 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:13,081 if you get my drift. 96 00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:16,209 I read you loud and clear. Heh, heh, heh, heh! 97 00:06:16,292 --> 00:06:19,045 Wow, a quarter past 6:00. 98 00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:20,880 What's keeping Dad? 99 00:06:20,963 --> 00:06:23,633 Yeah, who'd possibly be late on meatloaf night? 100 00:06:26,636 --> 00:06:28,805 I'd like some flowers. 101 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:30,515 What kind of flowers? 102 00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:32,475 You know, pretty ones, not dead. 103 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:35,144 We have some beautiful long-stem roses. 104 00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:38,481 - They're $55 a dozen. - One, please. 105 00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:54,330 - Hey, Mom. - How 'bout some grub? 106 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,833 Aaah! 107 00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:20,189 Your husband sees you as nothing. 108 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,900 The pig has made you into his mother. 109 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:26,070 You are not the hot love object you deserve to be, 110 00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:28,072 deserve to be. 111 00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:31,451 If he doesn't start loving... 112 00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:45,548 Marge, I, love you. 113 00:07:45,631 --> 00:07:47,550 No, that's not good. 114 00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:50,553 Marge, honey, I love you. 115 00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:52,555 Um... 116 00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:56,559 Marge, I love ya, baby. 117 00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:59,479 Marge, sweetie, "hooney," honey... 118 00:07:59,562 --> 00:08:02,398 This'll never work. 119 00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:14,202 - I love you, Marjorie. - Homer. 120 00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:17,205 I love you too. 121 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:19,248 Mmmwha! 122 00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:21,792 A little predinner entertainment. 123 00:08:21,876 --> 00:08:24,587 - Moe's Tavern. - Is Oliver there? 124 00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:26,923 - Who? - Oliver Klozoff. 125 00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:30,259 Hold on. I'll check. Oliver Klozoff! 126 00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,595 Call for Oliver Klozoff! 127 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,476 And I made reservations at the Chez Paree. 128 00:08:38,559 --> 00:08:41,729 But, Homer, it's so expensive. 129 00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:44,065 It matters not, mon frère. And after desserts, 130 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:45,691 we'll adjourn to our second-floor room 131 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:47,109 at the Offramp Inn. 132 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:49,278 Homer! I feel giddy! 133 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:51,531 Wait. What about a baby-sitter? 134 00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:54,283 - Oops. - Not to worry. 135 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:55,409 Listen, ya lousy bum. 136 00:08:55,493 --> 00:08:57,954 If I ever get a hold of you, I'll cut your belly open. 137 00:08:58,037 --> 00:08:59,789 Goodness. Must be a crossed wire. 138 00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:04,835 Rubber Baby Buggy Bumper Baby-sitting Service. 139 00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,504 This is Marge Simpson. 140 00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:09,006 - I'd like a baby-sitter for the evening. - Wait a minute. 141 00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:13,010 The Simpsons. Lady, you've gotta be kidding! 142 00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:19,392 Rubber Baby Buggy Bumper Baby-sitting Service. 143 00:09:19,475 --> 00:09:21,894 Hello. This is Mr. Sampson. 144 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:24,397 Did your wife just call a second ago? 145 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:25,815 No, I said Sampson, not Simpson. 146 00:09:25,898 --> 00:09:27,066 Thank God! 147 00:09:27,149 --> 00:09:30,653 Those Simpsons, what a bunch of savages! 148 00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:33,948 - Especially that big-ape father. - Doh! 149 00:09:34,031 --> 00:09:36,492 Actually, the Simpsons are neighbors of ours, 150 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,828 and we've found them to be 151 00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:41,163 a quite misunderstood and underrated family. 152 00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:44,083 Mom, you look so glamorous. 153 00:09:44,166 --> 00:09:47,712 Well, tonight is a very special night. 154 00:09:47,795 --> 00:09:50,798 Your father is taking me out for dinner and dancing. 155 00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:53,217 - Dad dances? - Like an angel. 156 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,052 ♪ Ba, ba ♪ 157 00:09:55,136 --> 00:09:57,930 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba, ba-ba ba-ba, ba, ba ♪ 158 00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,516 ♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba-ba ♪ 159 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,269 -♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba, ba, ba ba, ba, ba-ba ♪ 160 00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,604 Work that body, Homer. 161 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:06,856 You know, one day you'll learn 162 00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:09,275 - to move like your old man. - Not if I can help it. 163 00:10:09,358 --> 00:10:12,028 Son, there's not a woman alive... 164 00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:14,864 who can resist a man who knows how to mambo. 165 00:10:14,947 --> 00:10:16,741 You don't have a clue, do you, Dad? 166 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:17,992 Out, boy. 167 00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:21,370 - Out! - What a grump. 168 00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:32,632 Hee. 169 00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:35,259 Smooth as a baby's behind! 170 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:38,721 ♪ Ba, ba, ba-ba, ba-ba ba-ba, ba-ba, ba, ba ♪ 171 00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:41,932 Precious, I think I hear the doorbell. 172 00:10:42,016 --> 00:10:44,852 I think you're right, dumplin'. Bart! Get the door! 173 00:10:44,935 --> 00:10:46,937 Aye, aye, mambo man. 174 00:10:48,272 --> 00:10:49,398 Oof! 175 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,656 ♪ Ba, ba, ba-ba, ba-ba ba-ba, ba, ba ♪ 176 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:57,907 You must be the baby-sitter. 177 00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:01,077 - Yes. I am Miss Botz. - Just don't stand there, boy. 178 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,329 Help Miss Botz with her suitcases. 179 00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:05,581 I can handle my own luggage. 180 00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:08,084 Thank you for coming on such short notice, Miss Botz. 181 00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:10,836 Here are the phone numbers of the restaurant where we'll be dining, 182 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,297 and the motel where we'll be spending the night. 183 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:15,132 You'll have to put Maggie to bed now, 184 00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:17,426 but Bart and Lisa can stay up for another hour. 185 00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:20,304 Until then, they can watch a tape from our video library. 186 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:23,766 Boy! "The Happy Little Elves Meet the Curious Bear Cub." 187 00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:26,560 The Elves! The Elves! 188 00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:28,771 Bye, kids! Watch out for the boy. 189 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:33,275 Mmmwha! Bye, now. Mmmwha! Be good. 190 00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:36,028 - Mmmwha! Gotta go. - ♪ Ba, ba ♪ 191 00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:38,656 ♪ Ba, ba, ba-ba, ba-ba ba-ba, ba, ba ♪♪ 192 00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:42,034 Come, children. Let's go watch "The Happy Little Elves." 193 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:43,918 Look, lady, we've seen the Crappy Little Elves 194 00:11:43,994 --> 00:11:45,204 about 14 billion times. 195 00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:47,081 Maybe we can watch some real TV. 196 00:11:47,164 --> 00:11:48,499 We're gonna watch the tape. 197 00:11:48,582 --> 00:11:51,544 Aw! That's merely suggested viewing matter, lady. 198 00:11:51,627 --> 00:11:53,713 Mom lets us watch whatever the hell we want. 199 00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:56,215 I said you're gonna watch this tape. 200 00:11:56,298 --> 00:11:59,468 And you're gonna do what I say, or I'm gonna do something to you. 201 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,846 And I don't know what that is, 202 00:12:01,929 --> 00:12:04,473 because everybody has always done what I say. 203 00:12:10,688 --> 00:12:13,065 They all look so tasty, 204 00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,776 but I think I'll eat this one right there. 205 00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:17,486 Why don't you pick one 206 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:20,322 - that's a little more frisky, sir. - Why? 207 00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:23,159 Well, when you choose one that's floating upside down, 208 00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:27,204 it somewhat defeats the purpose of selecting a live lobster. 209 00:12:27,288 --> 00:12:32,001 Okay. Then I'll take that one there with the beady eyes. 210 00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:35,588 Excellent choice, sir. May I lead you to your table? 211 00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:37,923 Oui, oui. After you. 212 00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:40,634 And I'll be seeing you later. 213 00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:44,680 Help! Help! 214 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:48,684 Faster, faster! We gotta save Bubbles. 215 00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:51,812 Man, I can't take it anymore. 216 00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:55,191 - But I want to see what happens! - You know what happens. 217 00:12:55,274 --> 00:12:57,526 They find Captain Kook's treasure. 218 00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,463 All the elves dance around like little green idiots. 219 00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:00,529 I puke. The end. 220 00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:04,033 Bart, you're just like Chilly, the elf who cannot love. 221 00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:06,410 Now for some real TV. 222 00:13:06,494 --> 00:13:09,371 All right! "America's Most Armed and Dangerous." 223 00:13:09,455 --> 00:13:11,832 No! Bart! We'll have nightmares! 224 00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:14,251 Relax. This is cinema vérité. 225 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:15,854 When the brutal, slow-motion killing starts, 226 00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:17,630 I'll tell you to shut your eyes. 227 00:13:17,713 --> 00:13:20,174 The Cue Ball Killer should be considered 228 00:13:20,257 --> 00:13:22,051 extremely armed and dangerous. 229 00:13:22,134 --> 00:13:26,222 If you think you've seen him, call 1-800-U-SQUEAL. 230 00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,724 Homer, you look just like a little boy. 231 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,142 'Cause I'm so carefree? 232 00:13:30,226 --> 00:13:31,811 No, because you're wearing a bib. 233 00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:39,318 More champagne? 234 00:13:39,401 --> 00:13:42,738 Whoops. Time for a fill-up. 235 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:46,909 Garçon! Another bottle of your second-least-expensive champagne. 236 00:13:46,992 --> 00:13:48,032 The defenseless youngsters 237 00:13:48,077 --> 00:13:49,837 were tied up and gagged in the living room... 238 00:13:49,912 --> 00:13:52,540 while the bandit roamed through the house at will, 239 00:13:52,623 --> 00:13:56,836 stealing the valuable objects it took the family a lifetime to shop for. 240 00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:59,171 ♪♪ 241 00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:18,566 You know, Marge, this is just like when we were dating. 242 00:14:18,649 --> 00:14:22,111 Except for one thing... No chaperone. 243 00:14:22,194 --> 00:14:24,655 Ho, ho, hoo! 244 00:14:24,738 --> 00:14:25,906 The Baby-sitter Bandit 245 00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:28,033 has left a trail of her daring nighttime robberies 246 00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:30,160 across the continental United States. 247 00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:32,663 She could be lurking anywhere, 248 00:14:32,746 --> 00:14:35,016 about to descend upon another house full of unsuspecting dupes. 249 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:36,959 - Eee! - Wow! 250 00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:38,627 In a moment, we will show you 251 00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,311 a picture of the real Baby-sitter Bandit, 252 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,423 Miss Lucille Botzcowski. 253 00:14:42,506 --> 00:14:44,383 Remember, she may be using a clever alias... 254 00:14:44,466 --> 00:14:45,676 Botz! 255 00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:51,140 And should be considered armed and dangerous! 256 00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,684 - Aaah! - Aaah! 257 00:14:53,767 --> 00:14:58,022 - Aaah! - Aaah! 258 00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:11,118 Run for it! 259 00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:18,542 1-800-U-SNITCH. No, U-SQUEAL. 260 00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:21,462 No! 261 00:15:21,545 --> 00:15:23,464 ♪♪ 262 00:15:23,547 --> 00:15:26,508 Don't forget to tell me when you see the offramp. 263 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:28,969 There it... 264 00:15:29,053 --> 00:15:31,347 Went. 265 00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:32,973 No problemo. 266 00:15:33,057 --> 00:15:35,351 We'll just get off at the next exit. 267 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,197 Bart. 268 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,991 Bart. 269 00:15:52,076 --> 00:15:54,536 Bart. Bart. 270 00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:59,667 Time to brush your teeth, wash your face... 271 00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:02,086 and say your prayers. 272 00:16:02,169 --> 00:16:06,006 Are you in... here? 273 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:08,550 Homemade pickled beets. 274 00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:12,930 Go ahead. Take 'em all. 275 00:16:16,892 --> 00:16:18,519 Seeing as no one was hurt, 276 00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:20,771 I think it would be really silly to dwell on this. 277 00:16:20,854 --> 00:16:23,273 Come on! Come on! 278 00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:25,359 Finally! 279 00:16:25,442 --> 00:16:27,361 Hello, vigilant viewer. 280 00:16:27,444 --> 00:16:30,239 You have reached "America's Most Armed and Dangerous." 281 00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:32,741 I'm calling to report the Baby-sitter Bandit! 282 00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:34,618 She's in our house right... 283 00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:36,120 Come on, Marge. 284 00:16:36,203 --> 00:16:38,163 Let me carry you over the threshold. 285 00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:39,623 Okay, but watch out. 286 00:16:39,707 --> 00:16:41,625 Don't slam my head like last time. 287 00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:44,586 Sheesh! Eleven years ago, and you've never forgotten it! 288 00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:47,923 Don't muss my hair! 289 00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,634 Yi! Yeow! 290 00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:52,928 Whee! This is fun! 291 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,473 We know who you are, Miss Botz. 292 00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:59,393 Or should I say Miss Botzcowski? 293 00:16:59,476 --> 00:17:00,936 You're the Baby-sitter Bandit. 294 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,688 You're a smart, young man, Bart. 295 00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:05,441 I hope you're smart enough to keep your mouth shut. 296 00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:06,942 He isn't. 297 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,653 You're crazy if you think you're gonna get away with this, lady. 298 00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:10,863 You can't... 299 00:17:10,946 --> 00:17:14,158 I'm really not a bad person. Here. While I finish up, 300 00:17:14,241 --> 00:17:17,119 you guys can watch the rest of your favorite videocassette. 301 00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:22,583 Quiet, Bart! Let's make the best of this. 302 00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:25,544 Maybe I'll go slip into something 303 00:17:25,627 --> 00:17:28,088 a little more comfortable. 304 00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:32,092 Your blue thing with the things? 305 00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:35,429 - You'll see. - Well, shake a leg, mama. 306 00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:49,151 Kid stuff! 307 00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:52,529 Hardly worth it. 308 00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:54,531 Lotta junk. 309 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,992 Soileds. 310 00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:58,869 Stupid Sampsons. 311 00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:13,425 Maggie! Maggie! 312 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,010 Come here! 313 00:18:18,847 --> 00:18:21,016 - Good-bye! - Good-bye, everybody! 314 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,436 - Bye! - Yeah! 315 00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:29,566 Maggie, wanna watch "The Happy Little Elves" again? 316 00:18:29,650 --> 00:18:33,153 Okay, but you have to untie me first. 317 00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:38,450 Homer! 318 00:18:42,037 --> 00:18:44,998 Ho, ho, ho. 319 00:18:46,583 --> 00:18:48,752 So you got out of your crib. 320 00:18:48,836 --> 00:18:51,839 I guess you need to be tied up too. 321 00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:58,470 Maggie, where are you? 322 00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:01,515 Maggie! Maggie! 323 00:19:01,598 --> 00:19:03,851 Heh, heh, heh. 324 00:19:20,701 --> 00:19:24,997 Homer, would it spoil the mood if I called home, 325 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,833 you know, just to check on the kids? 326 00:19:37,384 --> 00:19:40,804 Homer, wake up! There's no answer at home. 327 00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,347 - So? - So I'm worried. 328 00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:44,141 I think we should go home. 329 00:19:44,224 --> 00:19:46,143 All right. 330 00:19:46,226 --> 00:19:48,812 I suppose my work here is done. Heh, heh, heh, heh! 331 00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:51,815 Hello, vigilant viewer. How may we help you? 332 00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:54,109 We caught her! We caught the Baby-sitter Bandit! 333 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,403 She's tied up at our house right now. 334 00:19:56,486 --> 00:19:59,406 - Ask if there's a reward. - Is there a reward? 335 00:19:59,489 --> 00:20:01,158 If she's convicted, we get T-shirts! 336 00:20:01,241 --> 00:20:02,701 Yeah! 337 00:20:02,784 --> 00:20:04,453 How come all the lights are on? 338 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:06,205 I don't like the looks of this. 339 00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:09,291 - Miss Botz! - Miss Botz! 340 00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:11,293 Good Lord! 341 00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:14,338 What have those little hellions done now? 342 00:20:14,421 --> 00:20:16,924 We're so sorry. We're so sorry! 343 00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:20,093 Please turn off the TV. 344 00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:23,680 I can't tell you how chagrined we are about all of this. 345 00:20:23,764 --> 00:20:25,390 These things are heavy. 346 00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:30,604 Just so there's no hard feelings, here's double your pay. 347 00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:32,606 - No, no, triple. - Thank you. 348 00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:34,650 Mr. Sampson, can I give you a bit of advice? 349 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:35,776 Sure. 350 00:20:35,859 --> 00:20:37,903 Don't turn your back on that boy for a second. 351 00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:42,074 Ain't that the truth? You know, one time he... 352 00:20:47,496 --> 00:20:48,932 This way to the scene of the crime, men! 353 00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:50,207 I got her tied up in the den. 354 00:20:50,290 --> 00:20:52,542 Just a minute, young man! 355 00:20:52,626 --> 00:20:54,127 I don't know what kind of shenanigans 356 00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:55,396 you've been pulling this time, 357 00:20:55,420 --> 00:20:57,256 but I just had to untie your baby-sitter 358 00:20:57,339 --> 00:20:58,715 and pay her off so that... 359 00:20:58,799 --> 00:21:00,759 Excuse me, sir, are you saying to the world 360 00:21:00,842 --> 00:21:02,344 that you just aided and abetted 361 00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:05,639 the escape of the notorious Baby-sitter Bandit? 362 00:21:05,722 --> 00:21:08,016 - The what? - The Baby-sitter Bandit. 363 00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:12,396 Are you sure this microphone works? 364 00:21:12,479 --> 00:21:16,024 Well, I wouldn't say I aided her. This is on, right? 365 00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:18,485 Because actually it was quite a struggle. 366 00:21:18,568 --> 00:21:21,071 Homer! 367 00:21:21,154 --> 00:21:22,614 Have you ever seen a kung fu movie? 368 00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:23,740 It was just like that. 369 00:21:23,824 --> 00:21:25,242 But now I know her moves. 370 00:21:25,325 --> 00:21:26,994 So, if you're listening to me, lady, 371 00:21:27,077 --> 00:21:29,121 you'd better think long and hard 372 00:21:29,204 --> 00:21:31,540 before trying something like this on Homer Simpson again! 373 00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:37,337 Lord, help me. I'm just not that bright. 374 00:21:37,421 --> 00:21:40,757 Homer, don't say that. 375 00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:43,593 The way I see it, if you raise three children 376 00:21:43,677 --> 00:21:45,971 who can knock out and hogtie a perfect stranger, 377 00:21:46,054 --> 00:21:47,597 you must be doing something right. 378 00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:48,807 Yeah. 379 00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:53,562 Yeah! 380 00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:58,608 Honey, can we make up again? 381 00:21:58,692 --> 00:22:00,986 My goodness! 382 00:22:46,114 --> 00:22:48,241 Shh!